Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Late Nights

Something's got to give. So many obligations. I wonder if I give proper attention to any of them.

Here's the deal: I am married, have three boys (21, 18, & 4 years old), pastor a church, and have a full-time salaried job. And there are only 168 hours in a week. And did I mention that I like to sleep?

So my life (and yours) is a matter of prioritizing. I shuffle cards pretty good (I didn't learn that in church!) and sometimes I just want to shuffle my priorities and whatever comes out on top gets my attention. But then I begin to rationalize why each priority deserves to be the priority. Then I pull what's left of my hair out.

Since prioritizing can't be a matter of random selection, there must be a way to organize priorities. If I organize them as listed above (wife, kids, pastorate, job) I don't think many people would object. That seems reasonable, doesn't it? I would be an unfit husband if I didn't put her first; and I don't want to be an unfit husband. I am supposed to love my wife as Christ loved the church - he gave himself for the church. I don't want to be an unfit husband.

My children - even grown - are a blessing and gift from God. You and I know kids who've been neglected by a parent. That's an awful thing to have happen to a kid. I decided a long time ago that my kids would have no reason to feel neglected by their father. God chose the image of "father" to describe his relationship to us. I want to become as much like that image as possible. The boys have to be a high priority. Who would object to that?

Being a pastor is a tremendous joy, honor, and privilege. It's a high calling. The church is full of people uniquely gifted by God's Spirit to be honorable tools in his hands. God works through all sorts of people to accomplish his work. Pastors are one of those he uses. He called some to be apostles and prophets and evangelists and pastors and teachers. And he called all of us to his work. He called me to be a pastor and teacher. The God of the universe called me. That has to be a priority, too.

Since I serve a small church I must have other employment to provide for my family. There are two reasons I must place a priority on my job. One is that it is how I primarily provide for may family. "If a man won't work, he shouldn't eat." I like to eat! I want my family to eat and enjoy electricity and have clothes to wear and all the other things people need to survive. And I want them to have a little of what they want. So my job is important. It's important for another reason. I represent God when I work for my employer. I don't want my coworkers to think Christians are lazy and God is indifferent. I want to make an impression on them so that they cannot use me as an objection to becoming a Christian themselves. I don't want the hierarchy of the company to find me mooching off them and thus gain a bad impression of Christianity. So I do my work as if working for the Lord. Wouldn't you?

So maybe just writing the words "Wife," "Kids," "Pastorate," and "Job" on separate index cards and shuffling them is not such a bad idea after all.

Here's a better idea. "Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." (Matthew 6:33)

Rather than having a list of priorities I simply have A priority. In pursuing God's kingdom (his realm of authority in my life) and his righteousness (his standard of right living) my relationship with my wife and children will be perfect; my service at pastor will be honorable, and my job performance will be outstanding.

Sure, I still keep "To Do" lists because I have to remind myself what needs to be done each day. The very first thing on the list is a quiet time with God. I like to do that very early in the morning - it doesn't always happen then, but that's my preference. I try to seek God before doing anything else because none of the rest of it matters without him.

It's late and I have an appointment with my Lord in the morning - early! That's the one thing that won't give.

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